God is all powerful, correct? Indeed He is. So if homosexuality is an abomination before Him, why does God even allow so many people, including myself, to be attracted to the same gender? God is the ultimate “decider” of all things, and nothing happens without His permission or decree–nothing. Whether people are “born gay” or whether it’s environmental/emotional causes that spur on homosexual feelings, doesn’t matter—God could stop people from being born gay and God can stop “gay-inducing” environmental/emotional causes from ever occurring in a person’s life. Either way, If God wanted to, He could have kept me from ever even beginning to feel attracted to other men.
If God wanted to, He could have stopped Satan before he ever rebelled; but He didn’t. He allowed it. If God wanted to, He could have stopped Adam and Eve before they ever ate of the forbidden fruit; but He didn’t. He allowed it. To go even further, God could have stopped the sinful desire that gave way to sin from ever manifesting in Satan, Adam or Eve. But He didn’t. Nor has he stopped sinful desire from manifesting in the rest of us. God, for reasons beyond our comprehension, has allowed a time for evil to have its place in this world and in the hearts of humanity.
Now don’t mistake what I’m saying…..I am not saying that God is sinful or that God sins because He allows us to be sinful and sin. God is perfect, infinitely righteous and good—He commits no evil. But it must also be understood that everything, and I mean everything, happens under the umbrella of God’s sovereignty—-including our brokenness and every one of our sins. We can’t fully understand why God has chosen to let sin and sinful desire manifest in the world He has created— the wisdom of God is unsearchable. But what we can know is what He has revealed to us in the Bible. And He has revealed quite a bit.
God uses sin for His purposes: The Cross.
All throughout the Scripture we see God achieving the purposes of His heart amidst our sinfulness and even through our sinfulness at times—the primary example being the crucifixion of His Son, Jesus Christ.
The worst sins ever committed since the creation of the world were committed against Jesus Christ as He was scourged, mocked, blasphemed, and torturously crucified—by the very creatures that He created. God used murderous men and their heinous sins to fulfill the purpose by which He would reconcile the world to Himself—and it wasn’t His “plan B’. He predetermined it to take place as it did.
“for truly in this city there were gathered together against Your holy servant Jesus, whom You anointed, both Herod and Pontius Pilate, along with the Gentiles and the peoples of Israel, to do whatever Your hand and Your plan had predestined to take place.”- Acts 4:27-28.
We find in the Cross the most powerful expression of the love of God toward mankind. Jesus Christ suffered death and the full wrath of God for His people, for the very people who rejected Him, so that they could be saved and forgiven forever. God brought about what would be the best news ever proclaimed in the earth through the sinful actions of human beings.
God is sovereign over the human heart.
When a person sins, the person ultimately has a choice to either carry out his sinful desire or to refrain from it, which is true. But what many people have a hard time explaining to people that have homosexual feelings is why do they have homosexual feelings if it’s wrong? People (including myself) are sometimes afraid to admit the fact that God has the final choice in whether or not a person struggles with homosexuality. But He does. God is God– and part of being God is having absolute authority over everything. God is in control over all of His creation, including our thoughts, feelings and emotions—our hearts. This is found throughout the entirety of Scripture. From Genesis to Revelation we see God hardening hearts, softening hearts, changing hearts, and on and on.
“The king’s heart is a stream of water in the hand of the LORD; He turns it wherever He will”- Proverbs 21:1
“But Sihon the king of Heshbon would not let us pass by him, for the Lord your God hardened his spirit and made his heart obstinate, that he might give him into your hand, as he is this day.”- Deuteronomy 2:30
“And the Lord said to Moses, “When you go back to Egypt, see that you do before Pharaoh all the miracles that I have put in your power. But I will harden his heart, so that he will not let the people go.”- Exodus 4:21
“I will give them a heart to know that I am the Lord, and they shall be my people and I will be their God, for they shall return to me with their whole heart.”- Jeremiah 24:7
As difficult as it is for us to grasp, our entire heart–everything we think or feel—is under the total control of God. The fact that I have homosexual feelings is not an accident or outside the control of God. God is choosing, this very day, to allow me to struggle with this. If you identify as gay or struggle with homosexuality, you need to know that God is choosing, this very day, to allow you to struggle with this. You might say, “Not fair! How can He tell me to turn away from something that He allows me to feel!”— I understand why you’d feel that way. I really, really do. For me the only thing that conquers that thought is remember what Jesus Christ did for us. It also wasn’t “fair” for Christ to die so that we could be forgiven for the things we did choose to do and to one day be freed from our sinful desires/sin nature completely. And not only will those who believe in Jesus be freed from sin’s presence one day, but we are freed from sin’s bondage now. Christians struggle, yes, and are tempted, yes… but Christians are not enslaved to sin like unbelievers are. We are able, by God’s Spirit, to choose to follow Christ rather than choosing to give into temptation. An unbeliever will not and can not choose to follow Christ rather than sin because the love of God has not been poured into their hearts by the Holy Spirit. But we have received God’s love which has enabled us to love Him back—and our love for Him frees us from the lordship of sin. <—–And we don’t get any of these benefits of Christ’s work if we want “fair”—-if we want “fair”, we get Hell. If you get nothing else out of this entire blog… please get this: Jesus dying for you was not “fair”— It was love.
So could God have stopped my homosexual feelings from ever developing? By all means, yes. But He didn’t, which in turn communicates to me that He has a purpose for allowing them to be there. I do not claim to know why. And I doubt that I’ll ever know the the fullness of His purposes in allowing me to struggle with this. But if I can be completely honest, I would venture to say that if it weren’t for these corrupt desires, I do not know that I ever would have considered myself sinful enough to need Jesus Christ. God definitely used my sexual brokenness to open my eyes to how depraved and in need of His mercy I am. But why didn’t He just cure me whenever I believed in Jesus? I don’t know… but I believe that my continual struggle is for a purpose. If God is in control of my struggles, which He is, then I know my struggles are not in vain! When I am at my wit’s end with wrestling with desires I know I shouldn’t act out on, I can always remember that God has allowed me to wage this war against the sin inside of me for a purpose. One purpose I do believe He uses my twisted desires to accomplish is to remind me of my minute by minute need for His grace, mercy and power. I am truly able to see, and rejoice in, how God has used such a detestable thing, like my homosexual feelings, to bring about my dependance on Him. And my dependance upon Him gives me joy and peace—which is true life.
I think I’ve been clear, but just in case, I want to say that I am in no way condoning nor encouraging one’s acceptance of homosexuality. We should want to turn from sin and fight temptation daily (in fact, we are commanded to… there is no negotiating) and pray that God deliver us from it! But my point is this: if the feelings don’t go away immediately and totally, as they often don’t, you can remember and believe that there is a reason, a purpose. This blog is geared toward the struggle with homosexuality…. but it applies to all sinful struggles. We all have sinful natures and struggles that we wish we didn’t have. But Christian, know that God is working everything— even your struggles—for your good and His glory. So keep fighting… soak yourself in the Word, pray without ceasing, and persevere.
“ And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.
What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?” Romans 8:28-32
- Matt Moore
[When I say "Be Gay" in the title, I mean it in the sense of someone who has homosexual feelings. I don't mean "Be Gay" in the sense of someone who chooses to act out and define themselves by those feelings. I know many Christians don't agree with the way I title some of my blogs, and I understand why--- it can be misleading, if you just read the title. But I do so because I'm trying to reach an unbelieving audience.. and when they use google, they are going to use the word "gay" rather than "same sex attraction" or "homosexuality" and are more than likely going to click the link if it's titled in a way such as this one.]